Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
