don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
