he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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