The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
