This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize