yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
