check it out our google latitudes are spooning
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
