It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
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You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
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Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Enjoy the penises
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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