didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
