First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize