If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Randomize
