After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize