i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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