I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
