that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
