I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
