I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
