He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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