My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
