Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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