I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
