Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize