Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
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You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
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If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.