Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
