drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
