I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
