Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize