we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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