Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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