12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize