She is in my trunk
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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