are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize