I wannas sexs uuuuu
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
