I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
