Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
