she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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