End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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