i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
