sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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