I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
