I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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