I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
