okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
