i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
