brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
