The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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