I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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