i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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