Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
oh god the rape fog is back!
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
