You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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