there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
