I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
