Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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