I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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